Annie Fox is an educator, award-winning author and trusted online advisor.  She was kind enough to take time out of her busy schedule and answer some questions relating to the Teen Pregnancy articles I have been writing and what is going on around our country today.

Cynthia Springsteen: Unfortunately you missed the movie called The Pregnancy Pact, but I understand that you wrote an article on it?

Annie Fox: Yes, I wrote the article about the original incident about a year and a half ago.

Cynthia Springsteen: Which I am going to link to below for the readers.

Annie Fox: Thanks!  I wonder if anyone ever did a follow up on these teen moms?

Cynthia Springsteen: That would of been a great story to follow up on.

Annie Fox: It would, apparently these girls thought having a baby would be the answer to all their problems... ha!

Cynthia Springsteen: They obviously had no idea what they were actually getting themselves into.  Do you think it was their parents fault in anyway, such as lack of communicating with them?

Annie Fox: Clearly a lack of communication and connection to their parents... Lack of sex education and real self-esteem building in a town which, I understand, doesn't offer a lot of "Big Horizon" options for young people.

Cynthia Springsteen: What was your initial reaction when you first heard of this pact that was made in this town?

Annie Fox: I was flabbergasted that any 21st century teen girl in the US could possibly believe that her only "option" for happiness, success, a life she could sink her teeth into... could only be found by becoming a single teen mom.  Also...  I had trouble wrapping my brain around the faulty logic of this kind of "group think"... Tells me that something has broken down very badly between parents to teens and teachers to teens. Sigh.

Cynthia Springsteen: Do you think that all the focus on these teen pregnancy issues on television now a days such as Teen Mom, Secret Life of an American Teenager, plus every sitcom drama having a story line that has teens getting pregnant and everything being fine is teaching them that they can make it?

Annie Fox: I'm not willing to generalize about tv shows or films I haven't seen. I loved Juno and thought it portrayed a realistic emotional backlash for the girl amongst her peers. From her perspective, being a pregnant teen did not look fun or glamorous in any way.

Cynthia Springsteen: Which we both know it isn't glamorous in anyway.

Annie Fox: Of course not!  But girls who try to get pregnant... like the ones in the Pact, are trying to fill an emotional and psychology void. They don't have a strong sense of competence and erroneously believe that if they have a baby well... that's something they'll be "good" at!  I'm willing to wager that none of these girls has a strong connection with a positive adult role model... especially a strong woman who is something more than a mom.

Cynthia Springsteen: Absolutely I agree with you 100% on that one, should there be more sex education in school or do you feel its something that should be better focused on in the home, as i have a tendency to think in school teenagers find sex something funny and not to listen to like they should be especially when they are with friends.

Annie Fox: Excellent sex educators who know exactly how to connect with teens need to be part of every high school staff. I know people who do this kind of work and I also know from the questions I've been receiving from tweens and teens around the world for the past 13 yrs, that young people are DESPERATE for this kind of information. Not just birth control info, but the opportunity, in a class setting, to discuss peer pressure to become sexually active, and to practice (role play) decision making skills in a safe environment. When we allow ultra-conservative powers to force sex ed out of the schools or to relegate sex education to an "abstinence only" curriculum... we ROB our kids of the information they need to make healthy choices. In my way of thinking, the last 8 years of Federal funding going to abstinence only programs is a key, direct cause of the increase in teen pregnancy in the US.

Cynthia Springsteen: Do you feel that schools should provide condoms? This was a major focus in the movie, although for those girls with the pact having protection was not in their minds but for the ones who do want the protection, but are afraid to walk into a pharmacy?

Annie Fox: We want our kids to be safe from STD's and unwanted pregnancy. That's key. They are going to have sex anyway. It's ludicrous and totally unrealistic to believe that you're going to eliminate sexual activity by taking away sex education and/or not talking about or providing condoms. The evidence shows the exact opposite is true! So the question may be this: if we, as a school, provide condoms to students who request them (very different from distributing them to everyone) are we, in fact, condoning and encouraging sexual behavior?" I think not. If a teen is considering becoming sexually active he/she is going to do it whether there's a condom involved or not. Conversely, if a teen is not comfortable or ready to become sexually active... a whole mountain of condoms isn't going to push him/her over the edge. I just don't buy that logic!

Cynthia Springsteen: I totally agree with you!

Annie Fox: Yep. In my book Teen Survival Guide to Dating and Relating (which is now available in its entirety as a free book download at www.anniefox.com/books/tsg.html I talk a lot about the emotional ramifications of choosing to have sex. This is especially important for girls to think about BEFORE they decide to have sex. And I also point out that this kind of thoughtful reflection is something a girl needs to think about each time she considers having sex. Too often girls believe "Well, I'm not a virgin any more so I automatically just say "yes" to any guy who I want to like me." That's just not smart thinking. But girls don't know that they ALWAYS have the choice to say "no." Seems weird to us as a adults, but teens are often challenged when thinking about the consequences of their actions. And girls are still in dreamy-land when it comes to knowing what a healthy relationship is... you know, mutual respect, honesty, trust, shared values, open communication. Too many teen girls believe (I swear this is true) that the only requirement for a guy to become a boyfriend is if he lets her know that he likes her. That's it! Pretty low bar, eh?

Cynthia Springsteen: Wow very scary!

Annie Fox: So when the guy shows an interest the girl jumps... "Ah! A guy likes me! My self-worth just soared!  My stock amongst my friends... just went up 100 points." So then the goal becomes "KEEP THE BOYFRIEND HAPPY so he doesn't leave and so you don't revert back to single status (AUGGGGGGGH!)" So by that way of thinking, when the guy says, Let's have sex, the girl is conflicted. She doesn't want to get pregnant (most of the time, Pact Teens excluded) but she really doesn't want to lose her boyfriend. If she has dutifully bought into all the cultural and media msgs about her true worth being her looks and her ability to attract guys, AND she has no strong female role models who show her a different way of being a woman AND no positive adult male role models who value her for her intelligence, creativity, athleticism, sense of humor, ingenuity, etc. etc.... well, then our teen girl is probably going to have sex with the guy. And when he dumps her 3 weeks later (after telling everyone exactly what they did together) this girl is not going be feeling all that great about herself. Nor is she likely to have learned anything important and valuable from the experience. Double SIGH.

Cynthia Springsteen: I know all this is so true and it really frightens me personally as a parent of teenager myself and everyone says to themselves my story title "This Can't Happen To My Family, but it can!

www.anniefox.com/pdf/teen_pregnancy_pact.pdf

Read more about Annie Fox, her books and her work at  www.anniefox.com/index.html

If you live on Long Island and are dealing with a teenage pregnancy. There are options for your teenager. At the Nassau Boces there is a program entitled "The Teen Parenting Program." This program helps teenagers finish high school and also helps them become responsible, competent mothers.

www.nassauboces.org/ipas/schools/tap.htm